without the shedding of blood...

There have been only a few things happen in my life that were so... heavy my brain could not comprehend what exactly was going on. Emotions completely overwhelm, and I can't process what's occurring around me. Events so momentous that I'm left wondering how to even begin understanding what I both saw and felt. 9/11, for instance. Visiting the orphanages and leper colonies in China. And yesterday's sacrifice ceremony.

Yesterday was Eid Al-Adha, a holiday remembering Abraham's life, specifically his faith demonstrated in his willingness to sacrifice his son. To commemorate this event, cows and goats are sacrificed at local mosques and homes. Some hold this to be only a remembering of Abraham's willingness and G-d's provision, but others, like the leader we talked to, believe it to be forgiveness of wrongs - "Without the shedding of blood, there is no forgiveness of sin" (Hmm, sounds familiar...) One goat covers one person, and one cow seven people. At the ceremony where we were, 21 cows and 15 goats were killed - 162 people.

As we walk up, the smell is overpowering. The leaders see us and wave us over, pleased to inform a foreigner about the event. It takes me a minute or two to get enough used to the stench to go through the gate. Bloodied carcasses lay on a square slab of concrete where the slaughter occurred. Only three cows are left. Arabic singing, recitations from their book, sounds loudly from the speakers. I watch a scrawny cow fight as hard as he can against the rope lassoed around his neck as he is dragged towards the front. He struggles to remain standing on the bloody concrete as ropes from all sides pull him down. He loses.

A man carrying a large knife walks barefoot through the blood to the still struggling beast. As he kneels next to its head, kids and parents inch as close as they dare, eager to see the slaughter.

And it's at this point that my heart can't handle anymore. I quickly turn away, fighting back tears. When we get home, I shower, trying to wash off the smell of blood that followed me home. And I sit, trying to process all of my thoughts and emotions.

Caution: Not for the faint of heart - The aftermath

I'm going to admit something here. After thinking things through, I realized what got to me the most wasn't all the blood and the guts everywhere. It was the cow.

Don't get me wrong, I'm no vegetarian. I love meat and could eat meat all day... as long as I never met the cow. I know, it's silly, but it's the truth. If I've met the cow beforehand, it will be extremely hard for me to enjoy eating him, even if he's in the form of a delicious hamburger.

And here I was, witnessing a helpless cow being pulled and prodded to its death. I hadn't even met the thing, but my heart was screaming, "STOP! HE DIDN'T DO ANYTHING! HE DOESN'T DESERVE THIS!"

It took about two seconds for my heart to translate this into something deeper.

It all points to HIM.

HE was our sacrifice. He is the fulfillment of the OT, what the sacrificial system symbolizes. The perfect lamb of G-d. And unlike this cow, he didn't have to be prodded and dragged to his death but was like "a lamb that is led to the slaughter, a sheep that before its shearers is silent." The Son - the Word, the light of the world, G-d himself - willingly takes all of our punishment, and what he accomplished was final.

There is nothing we can do to earn favor; depraved man cannot approach holy G-d on his own merit. JC has done it all completely. His blood covers me. He has made a way. He is the way.

"If the blood of goats and bulls... sanctify for the purification of the flesh, how much more will the blood of JC, who through the eternal Spirit offered himself without blemish to G-d, purify our conscience from dead works to serve the living G-d." -Heb 9:13-14

"By a single offering he has perfected for all time those who are being sanctified." -Heb 10:14 

"If JC be G-d and died for me, then no sacrifice can be too great for me to make for him." - C.T. Studd

fall festivities

I love fall. That's one of the things that's been hardest to adjust to - having only two seasons: dry and rainy. While loved ones back home may be enjoying the crisp autumn air; leaves changing into brilliant shades of yellow, orange, and red; and corn mazes in the shape of Abraham Lincoln, I'm sweating in the constant 90-degree heat, missing the festive hayrides and cider.

Well, last week, we brought a little bit of America to southeast Asia with a Fall Festival! Complete with homemade scarecrows, caramel popcorn, and pumpkin decorating. We taught them about the four seasons and how fall is associated with the harvest. They learned how to play hot potato with a pumpkin that surprisingly didn't bust when it was dropped and got to take pictures next to our scarecrows (which I somehow managed to not get a single picture of). I did get some pictures of our other festivities, however.

Caramel popcorn! We put the caramel on the side because A: they tend to not like really sweet things,
so B: we didn't want to waste any of the precious caramel sauce.

A group decorating their pumpkin

The finished pumpkins. The front left pumpkin was the winner. Earlier we talked about the seasons, and so this group decorated their pumpkin with scenes from spring, summer, fall, and winter.
If you'll notice the back right pumpkin, you may see a familiar face. It's Angry Birds!

Nothing could have finished the evening better than a little bit of line dancing. That's right: imagine 30+ Asians dancing to the Cotton-Eyed Joe. Highlight of the evening. We had a blast, and it was great to be able to share fond traditions from home with new friends.

wedding karaoke

For your enjoyment. Example of karaoke being for fun, not show of talent.

Language school day 1: "Ah, bay, chay, day..."

Little else is more humbling than having to relearn the alphabet.

Day one of language school is officially over. Even though our lesson was only two hours long, we learned a TON of stuff. Okay, maybe "learn" is not the right word. There are a lot of new words floating around in my brain. Whether or not I've learned them is another issue.

The other part of our schooling is spending two hours out in the community trying to use what we learned. I can see how this is extremely beneficial for language learning. However, for an introvert, this is also very uncomfortable, for lack of better words. I like to have everything perfect before I try it out. So, here I am, carrying around my little cheat sheet, walking through the market that's two blocks down from our house, and all these people are staring at me, and I just want to hide. Morgan, on the other hand, is thrilled to be able to speak to the people, even if we do only know three phrases, and is walking fearlessly up to people right and left. I do a little pep talk to gather enough courage to walk up to an ibu, or older woman, on the side of the street. By the time I stumble through my second phrase, a small crowd has gathered to listen to the buleh, and they're all laughing at me, who knows why exactly.

After a couple attempts, we enter a local department store and walk up to the friendly workers who are hanging around. Talking to people who smile at you and don't gather crowds is a lot easier. After a while, the people whom Morgan has already talked to spot me wandering and run up, stand in front of me, and smile, waiting for me to practice my horrible language skills. Thank you, Morgan, for making the rest of my day a hundred times easier.

Despite being absolutely exhausting and challenging, in more ways than one, today was a very successful day. I'm not sure how I'm going to feel at the end of the week, but I'm just taking it day by day. Perlahan-lahan - Slowly, step by step.

"G-d is able to make all grace abound to you, so that having all sufficiency at all times, you may abound in every good work." 2 Cor. 9:8